I've been impatient lately. Restless. I want to do His work. Now.
And I know that I do His work everyday by showing love to others, by keeping my eyes open for opportunities to spread the message of the Gospel, by getting to know my friends better, by doing ANYTHING out of love. True love. Agape.
I feel that the restlessness that I've been feeling is a call to action. What sort of action that is is something that I don't know yet.
I want answers from God. Now.
I want to know where He's calling me to do missions work in the future, even though I won't be doing anything until at least January, and most likely not until I graduate.
I want to know if I'm called to be married with anyone or if I'm called to a single life. And if I am called to married life, who am I supposed to be with?
I want to know if I'm going to be an addictions counselor like I've been planning on for the last year and a half or if I'm going to be a career missionary.
Why do I need answers right now? Why can't I just enjoy what I know and have?
Abraham and Sarah waited for TEN YEARS before they received Isaac. They needed the kind of patience that only the Holy Spirit can provide.
I need that same patience because it could be a long time before I receive answers.
I was listening to music on Youtube and the Jars of Clay song "Oh My God" was a recommend video. While listening to it, I was reminded of their song "Scenic Route" and of the bike ride that God took me on last summer.
I felt restless one night. I didn't want to stay at my parents' place while they were drunk. I got the urge to go for a bike ride, so I did. Anything to get out of the house.
I got on the bike, started pedaling, and I felt something in my heart. The Holy Spirit was directing my path that night. Every crossroads that I got to, I checked which way the Spirit led me. I urge you all to do this in your own lives. PLEASE LET THE HOLY SPIRIT DIRECT YOU AT EVERY CROSSROADS YOU COME ACROSS.
I rode around Perham on my mom's bike for over an hour. It might have even been longer than 2 hours. I wasn't keeping track of time. I do remember getting impatient though. I knew that I was being led somewhere, I just didn't know where. I wanted to know!
Eventually, I got to my destination. I knew I was in the right place because the presence of God was so strong that i nearly cried.
I was at St. Paul's church. I rode around the tiny town of Perham for I don't know how long, taking some streets 3 or more times, passing every church in town except for 2 (it was at least 5 churches that I did pass), going by St. Paul's once or twice already, all to end up at this church that I was called to attend.
Why did God send me on this long path to get to a church that is literally only 3 blocks away from my parents' apartment? I believe that it was to give me a lesson in trusting in Him and to teach me patience. He wanted me to start walking by the Spirit more.
Why was I sent to St. Paul's anyway? I don't know why it was that church in particular. I do know that that was where He sent me and that He wanted me to spend a lot of time with Him along the way, so that's what I did and what I'm continuing to do.
