As I was going out to my sister's in Bismarck yesterday, I had the urge to go someplace that didn't have the visible signs of civilization. I want to visit nature as God created it. No houses, no apartment buildings, no store, no factories, no farms. Not even a road. I just want to see actual nature. The closest that I've ever been is a campground, but even campgrounds have man-made trails, litter, and some development. I just want someplace where I can forget that there is anybody in the world except me and God.

Why I Turn to God

A Band-Aid is supposed to cover a wound while it heals. It's supposed to protect. I have several Band-Aids in my life, most of them are not helpful at all.

Food
Lust
Alcohol
Video games
JESUS

These are my Band-Aids. 4 of them are infecting and 1 is an antibiotic.

All my life I've turned to food. It has always been a comfort and still is. I would eat and eat and feel better for a while, but then the pain would seep back in. All it did was cover the wound, and not for long. This germ-filled Band-Aid gave me comfort momentarily and then I felt worse than before. Now I feel full and bloated from the food.

I've struggled with lust for years. What person in America hasn't? I've turned to people in pain or for selfish reasons. I would spend time with women specifically for the physical comfort that they could bring. A hug, cuddling, or something further. It would feel very pleasant at the time, but by the end of the night, I'd realize that I had done something wrong. Even before Jesus saved me, I would have these feelings. I would realize that I was turning to someone to satisfy my desires and that it was only harmful.

Alcohol would only make my other struggles worse. It would fill me with lust and make me hungry. And it was considered socially acceptable to act on these desires while drunk. Seeing people drink brings back these memories and the memories of growing up with alcoholic parents.

Video games are a huge time waster for me. I can still spend hours playing video games alone, doing nothing constructive. After I'm done playing, I just feel empty and miserable inside.

The only thing that I've ever found to fill me up for any length of time longer than just over the duration of the event is Godly time. Either spending time alone with Him or talking with people about Him, they both fill me up for extended periods of time. He is all I need and I look forward with much anticipation to the day that I get to spend eternity at the banquet at His Father's house. There will be no more pain and no more lusting after earthly desires. Nothing but eternal heavenly bliss. And it can be your fate also if you just accept Jesus as your Lord and Savior.

because, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. ~ Romans 10:9

Until next time, God bless!